For someone who failed English in school...

... I am pretty surprised how now I think, dream and express myself better using this language.
I know my English is not perfect (far from it) and I know I make - a lot of - mistakes but for some weird reason when I try to write in Portuguese nowadays, I think it looks like a 10 years old wrote it.
Maybe the real problem is the fact I like to write like I talk, and for the best part of the last 7 years I have been talking in English, and definitely in the last year this has been at least 95% of the rate Portuguese/English use for me.
Is funny like some expressions simply take over, some expressions which don't have translation to Portuguese or sometimes I can't even recall how you would say something in Portuguese (the other day I was struggling to remember how to say lamb/sheep).
Don't get me wrong, I haven't forgotten my mother tongue, I don't believe it is possible to happen to anyone!
I just think my brain is better trained now to work in English. I love Portuguese, I am happy my Squeedge is also learning it so we can speak Portuguese between us, I still speak Portuguese with my Brazilian friends I have here, I write Portuguese e-mails, I listen to Brazilian music, I read Brazilian news... I always make sure I don't loose contact with it, just in case...
I like the richness of our language, but maybe that's exactly why my brain takes the English route, it is so much simpler! :)


So here you go, this is why I write in English, but I have put a translator on the write side of the blog, and you can comment either way, as long as it is one of the two!

What a difference 2 years make...

I've just realized how people's life change even when you're not watching them.
I know, it is stupid and obvious, of course their lives change! Is not like they would wait sitting on naughty corner while little me here (gosh I hope this acronym is nothing rude!) had her own problems to deal with, but what I mean is that while I was taking time off from my virtual life, I thought people's life would not change that much, naively enough.
To go back to old virtual friendships, chapters of books I was used to read, like a soap opera I~d watch everyday...
I thought I would just start following them again, from the last time I remember reading the last word they wrote on the last day I felt in a sane, happy, with not-a-care-in-the-world mood enough to go through my routine of checking if they needed a friend's shoulder to cry on, a friend's word to rely on, or a friend's cheer to celebrate on.
During this 2+ years (almost 3) my life went through such turmoil I could barely cope with my problems, let alone cope with others.
And their lives did everything but freeze.
Some got married, some split up, some had children who are now big and smiley, some learnt some instruments... Some changed jobs, some travelled and changed countries!Some are on the same life but with a different outlook...

I feel a bit sad for not being there for them. I feel a bit guilty because I chose to go away and not leave a trace so they could find me. It was my choice to go and hide in my cave when things were going from bad to worse.
It makes me think that maybe it was my life that I wanted to freeze, to pause, to stop. But I also wanted to fast-forward it. To a time where I'd be happy again, sane again, with not-a-care-in-the-world frame of mind.
I think this day has arrived again. Is funny how I never stopped writing even knowing (and not wanting) no one would read whatever I wrote. So here I am again.

I hope to reconnect to books and soap operas authors that I would follow in the past. Find out they are happy and content as much as I am now (well, most of the time).

But even if I don't ever find them again, or hear from them again, I hope it is true.

A little less conversation, a little more action please.

One of the things I can't get over with the new job is the huge unmeasurable amount of talking that is done. And most of the time is for nothing.
They have conferece calls for absolutely everything. Some days there are two conference calls to talk about the same thing!! (literally to repeat it to different people)
It drives me nuts how these are not productive at all, and the time wasted could've been used doing what they talk so much about doing.
Don't get me wrong, this is a big company spread all over the world and we need the meetings to know what everyone is doing, but I do believe it goes over the top most of the time.
My boss is constantly on meeting, which a few minutes between them to actually do his work! He ends up staying up until 11:00 PM at least every night to take care of e-mails and do any work he has to do.
Sometimes I wonder if they do it on purpose. It is always easier to escape to a meeting instead of doing what you have to do.
My approach,I find, is much better. Twitter, blogs and MSN messenger can always fill my day. I'll do my work on the spare time.
You'd think they'd know I don't work that hard, but they always love my results, and think I am wonderful! =)
So my theory of having fun while working, may just be what everyone needs to deliver!