I am blast from the past

Like I've mentioned here, on my coming back to the blogsfera I thought of trying to reconnect with people who I had left behind, people I really cared for in the past.
People who I'd spend hours chatting on MSN developing close friendships, or reading their blogs...
Because I was the one choosing to retreat from the net world, I thought was only fair to go after them again, revert that choice...
But it never went through my mind they could be the ones choosing to retreat from me.
I have never received any harsh word from those I befriended with and if that ever happened, we always talked things through and if the decision to cut off the friendship was taken it was always mutual, it was always something we knew why was happening and why we would not be friends anymore.
One of this closest friends still accepts to be around but not as close as before. Another one was pretty much direct when posting on a network site "What should she do if someone from the past appears again and you wish she stayed in the past" two days after I went to her blog and netsite to say I was glad to have found her again and to see she was happy. After that last post she protected her posts and I am not included in those ones allowed to see it.
Of course I took the hint and accepted the fact she does not want me in her life again, so is only a matter of respect I don't follow her on her blog again or try to contact her again.
What breaks my heart is to have absolutely no idea why they would prefer it that way. I am so afraid of hurting people's feelings, of being cruel, or even unfriendly, it makes me totally paranoid to think I may have gone and done just that.
I don't mind people not liking me, not considering their best friends. No one can't be the best friend of everyone, and I know friendships can just grow out of itself with time and distance, but to completely repel someone?
And why just not be honest? Why not just write to me and tell me how they feel?
That would be what I would do, not send messages with double meanings, that hurts so much more...
Anyway, Mr J and Mrs M came to my rescue when I was having a cry about it (I can't believe I actually cried over it) and reminded me how wonderful I am, and how much all my other friends love me and are happy to see me well again...
I know in my heart I do everything I think is right, I do my bit.
I need to learn to deal with the fact people will change, move on and leave you behind.
Sometimes you didn't even do anything wrong, that is just life. :)

"Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense, and have her nonsense
respected." Charles Lamb